Top 5 Ways to Balance Your Work and Personal Lives with Tammie Slay

It is life-changing wisdom in a really, really very easy to read format. And a great challenge because the way you're supposed to do it is you read the story and then you get into the scrolls and you read the scrolls three times a day for 30 days. You read one scroll three times a day for 30 days, and then you move to the next scroll. And it really does change the way you think. And I don't know about you, Tammy, but the first time that I did that challenge, I thought it was a little hokey at first to be right. Yeah. And so, but the first time I really kind of dug in to the, I'm going to read this three times a day, twice in the, or once in the morning, once at lunch, and then out loud at night, the more I read them, the more I picked up stuff as the month would go on. So like two weeks in, I'd be like, you know what? I know that I've read that three times a day for 14 days so far, but it never really hit me until I read it this way right now, how important that one sentence in that scroll was or whatever it was. And I just took away a different thing every time you read it. Uh, I think it's just a, you know, it's, it's a, it's a mind shifting book in the way you approach things. It really is. And I have been surprised now. I never heard of this book until I started coaching with workmen and same thing with you. The first time I read it and it said, read it three times a day, I went, um, I, I didn't think the word hokey, but now I will. Um, and I hear this from other people, but I did think that's a little much and, um, why? And then I thought, well, the purpose of the book there, I mean, they're getting no more money out of me. If I read it a second time or a third time, I already bought the book. So there's gotta be a purpose to why it's adjusted. And then I started learning all of these successful people, highly successful people have read this book and have done the same exercise of reading those scroll three times a day, even Matthew McConaughey, and it changed his life. I was just about to say Matthew McConaughey.

Yes. And so I did it as well. And I, and that's where the scrolls, when I read them the first time, there were some things I'm like, I'm not sure about this, but it challenged me to be more open in my limiting beliefs and to look at things from a different perspective and to consider things in a wider picture and, or even a broader picture. And, um, yeah, it's been life-changing for me too. Absolutely. I, uh, I listen, I'm, I'm, I don't have the attention span to listen to, um, books on, on audio when I'm at work or something like that, because there's just always interruptions, but when I go walk, I listen and I have that time. Um, and so I was listening because everybody said it's way better if you listen to Matthew McConaughey, read his book to you as opposed to actually reading the book. And he starts talking about the scrolls and I'm like, no shit. Matthew McConaughey, we're basically the same now, right? You know what? You are.

Awesome. All right. So we are going to talk about balancing personal life with business. Um, and I think that it's important before we jump in, if, if, if I, we can kind of riff on this for a second, it is important to separate the two because you have to have that separation to restore and renew and be better. But I don't think that there has to be a clean cut. Like I think your personal life informs how you run your business. It informs things like core values in your business and stuff like that, but it doesn't necessarily have to, you have, you can't allow your business to run everything in your life. Right. Right. Yeah. So with that, and I, and I agree, there can't be just a, I'm going to forget about my family while I'm in business because I'm actually in business because of my family.

And the reason I work is for my family. The reason I have dreams and I have ambitions is for my family. So I get up and I go to work every day for my family and because of my family, same thing when I get home at night from work and, um, I don't forget about my clients. You know, I, I love my clients. I don't just say out of sight, out of mind, I'm done with them. But what I have done and what I've learned is set boundaries. And there are boundaries that I set when I am in business mode. And that means that if one of my kids calls me, I'm going to answer the phone because they know that they only reach out if it's an emergency. And I give that importance. The difference in the way I approach it when I, when I mixed both is I ignored my phone. When my kids would call, I would ignore it because they were calling 15 times a day. Right. And they were calling about things like, Hey, we're out of milk. Can you bring more milk home? Or I got a homework assignment due tomorrow and I need some construction paper and it wasn't an emergency. And so I was always very reactive. And also I started ignoring and I didn't take control of my day. And by taking control means I preset boundaries on what I'm doing at certain times of the day and where my main focus is. So when I'm at work and I am hyper-focused and hyper-intentional because I've set boundaries that limit a lot of the other distractions. So I don't have to work at seven o'clock at night and I don't have to work at eight o'clock at night because I'm not stressed that 15 times a day when my kids are calling and I'm finding I'm ignoring a lot of those calls, it hurts me. Right. Right. I mean, I feel it. And then it takes me a moment to get back into the prospecting call. Or then when I answer the phone and they say, I have a homework assignment and I need cotton. Can you get me some cotton at CVS? And I go, are you kidding me? You called me for cotton? And then I just bring this conflict and this anger in and it serves no purpose. Right. So when I reshifted my mind on, I love my family, so I'm going to be hyper-focused at work. And in order for me to be hyper-focused at work, to be very intentional there, I have to put in place pre-boundaries and I have to take care of that up front. And I have to almost protect my work hours. Right. And I did. And I had a conversation, we had a family meeting and that was a lot of fun. And we read the scroll and I asked their thoughts and I asked their input and it was kind of a family council. And we just set up a system in place.

And so if they need me to pick up something from the store, they add it to a checklist. There you go. They don't have to call me, but if that phone rings, you know, it's an emergency. Right. They have my attention, no matter where I'm at, 100%, they're number one and they have my attention. And my phone rings less now because we've set systems in place. So let's flip that. Do you do the same thing with your clients? I do do the same thing with the clients and it's the same thing. It is a client council. Now I don't call it a client council. I may now, cause I just liked that in my head, but it's the upfront meeting when you're going through all the agreements, when you're going through the expectations, when you're hiring me, then we go through a little checklist of things that we're going to talk about.

And one is I will promise to you and I make a commitment to you, Mr. and Mrs. Client that I am going to be hyper-focused at work. And during these hours, I am going to get everything accomplished that I need to get accomplished. That doesn't mean you can't call me after hours. What that means is when you call me, I will answer that phone, but you need to know you're taking me away from bedtime. You're taking me away from a game. You're taking me away from my family. So please be respectful of that. If you can contact me during the day, do it. Then if you can send me an email, do it. Then if you need to text me, do it. Then I have a transaction coordinator. I have an assistant. I have a marketing person. I have a lot of people on the team. You're going to get everybody's contact information. Um, but please help me to respect my home life and my family.

I've asked it of my family to leave me alone during the day. I want to ask it of you. Please leave me alone. But if you call me, I'm going to think it's an emergency. So I'm going to ask you this because we had a very similar discussion a couple of episodes back when we were talking about specifically for brand new agents, this setting expectations, setting boundaries, conversation. Um, because I mean, you know, you give an inch, they take a mile, right? You let them call you at 8 PM. One time. They're going to call you at 8 PM every single time and think that it's okay. Uh, how many times since you started doing that with clients, has somebody said, Oh, you're not gonna answer my call at 8 PM. Then I don't want to work with you. Oh, never. Right. I think that's a fear that a lot of agents have that if I'm really stern and I set these set boundaries with people that I'm in some way sacrificing service or not doing my job well, but what it really is, is it's being more professional about how you do your business. Yeah. If you want to separate yourself as a professional in business versus a hobby doing a little craft on the side, have that conversation with your people and set those boundaries because there's nothing that gives a testament to your clients that I'm a professional when I control my schedule and I have work hours and I have home hours and any other professional out there. I mean, any other adults out there is going to respect that even teachers have work hours and they have personal hours. And so hobby agents, agents that are doing it as a hobby will be very reactive and they will answer the phone whenever, but I'm a professional and I've run a big business and I do a lot of transactions. And so I have to have systems in place for this and the boundaries.

Perfect. Love it. All right. So we're going to jump into our Top 5 strategies to balance personal life and business. So the number one thing that you put on your list when we were going through this is something that we try to preach inside of our brokerage to people all the time. And that's self-care. So tell me what that means to you. And let's talk a little bit about self-care. Okay. Similar. And we've heard it used before, similar to when you're on an airplane and the flight attendant is given the instructions in case of an emergency, put your mask on first before helping someone else. We have to take care of ourselves because who has the greatest responsibility to take care of each of us individually. We do in order for me to take care of my clients, in order for me to take care of my children, in order for me to take care of my dog, in order for me to take care of everybody else that I love. I have to love me first.

And Tammy has to take care of Tammy. And it was something that I actually give credit to my mom for teaching me at a very young age. And that is you take care of Tammy in all ways. And as I've become an adult and become a leader, I have learned that there is this belief out there in society that taking care of ourselves can be considered selfish. And it's anything, but it takes time. It takes commitment. It can often take money. Um, but it, the greatest gift is time. And the greatest gift I can give me is the time to invest in me. And the greatest gift I can give anyone else in my life is to take care of me and love me. And through loving me, I love other people greater.

So in the, in the financial planning universe, you hear retirement planners and people talk about pay yourself first before you pay all your other bills and you do everything else. You take the money that you need to make sure that you can live the life you want to later. And you set it aside. It's, it's really the same analogy just with whatever it is that makes you happy. So let's give some examples of what that looks like. Okay. Um, so one is on my business planning. And when I do my strategic plan for the year, I include Tammy on there. And that means how am I going to grow Tammy? What am I going to do to invest in Tammy? I'm going to make sure Tammy is happy at the end of the year. And then I also a lot, a certain amount of money to invest in Tammy. But what does it look like for Tammy is one, I do a lot of walking. No, I would average, um, depending on my mood, but walking for me is, um, very meditative and very renewing. And I can walk anywhere. I would say this year, I'm averaging seven to 10 miles a day. Oh, wow. A day. Wow. That's a lot of steps. And I don't run. I never run. I never run. Me neither. But I do walk and I listen to music and people have asked me, do you prospect while you're walking? No, it's for me. And I walk in the morning and I walk in the evening and it's just in my community and it's my neighborhood, but it's how I get up in the morning.

And it's how I put my mind back in a reset in the evening. I will say when my kids were younger, that walking looked like anywhere from two to four miles a day. And now I'm in a different phase in my life where I'm not having to wake up with young kids in the morning. And so walking it's free and it takes time and it's all for me, every bit of it. And I rarely invite anyone to join me on my walk. And second is I love dancing. So I take three different dancing lessons and that is an investment of money, but it's something I love. There's just something about very freeing with your motions and your body. And, and I have different dancing tricks. I have one that's totally freestyle. She's like, what's your mood? What song do you want? And I get in there and I'm either slow or I'm just beating it out. And, um, so dancing's one. Um, I do, um, spend time and money. I do like getting facials. I do like to be pampered. Um, many women do and many men do too as well. So I do get facials and I get, I get those regularly. Um, I do also get massages. Massages is something I do every two weeks. Me too. Do you really? I do. It's my, I have one tomorrow actually that it's, you know, it's that it's one hour where no one can interrupt me and it's just stress relief and usually a fairly decent nap. Um, cause I'm one of those people, seriously, a masseuse could walk in and like start the massage and then walk back in an hour later and be like, I'm done. And I would not know the difference. Okay. When I fall asleep in a massage, I'm depressed afterwards. I'm like, I missed it.

I'm good. I can feel the relaxation. I'm fine. It works for me. Yeah. So for me, it's every other week I get a massage and we've done that now for a couple of years. Um, I work out three times a week and then my secret one that I don't tell very many people, but now apparently I'm going to tell whoever listens to this podcast, I will sneak out in the middle of the day sometime and go watch a movie. I love movie. I love going to the, I love the experience of going to the movie theater. Like the last year with COVID lockdown, where the movie theaters closed, I've just hated it. I love the experience of going to the movie theater. And there are movies that I want to watch that I know that no one else in my family is going to want to watch. And that's perfectly fine. I'll just roll out at like two o'clock on a Tuesday and go see a movie.

I love that chance. Yeah. It's a great thought. And I love that you figured out what works for you and cause it's different for everybody and those little unique things. That's amazing. Now I will say everybody that's listening, it's likely your assistant. Um, when she looks around the office, she can walk into a movie theater and she's going to go, found you. Yep. And that's fine. She can sit down and watch a movie with me. I don't care. Um, so I don't know about you, but one of the things when it came to the realization that I needed to take time either off completely or just for myself was I have to schedule that. If it's not on my schedule, it will not happen. And I know that for sure. And when I put it on my schedule, I've got to make sure that it's a non-negotiable like, uh, Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday from five to six, I'm in the gym. Those are my three hours of the week that I'm in the gym. I'm not answering phone calls, not letting anything distract me. I'm just in the gym. And that's that. And it has to be on the calendar. It won't happen.

I agree. And I second that anybody listening to this, that's actually very wise for you to bring up because it it's true. If you just think I'm going to randomly get a massage or I'm ready, randomly going to schedule a walk. It won't happen. You will put everything else last or you'll put everything else first and you'll fit that last. Right. Yeah. And same for me, I have noticed when I travel and I don't do my walking in the morning or the evening, you feel different and, and, and there's a commitment, but I got to reset this or I got to remember next time I, I travel to get in a walk. It may not be seven miles because you know, traveling there, the work day is a little bit different, but I got to at least get in something for me. That's where my mind resets. Well, you know, we, we started looking at this whole idea of a morning routine to kind of set your mind up for the day, set your attitude, all of that probably three years ago when we read the miracle morning as part of our brokerage book club. And again, the first time I read it, I was like, this is kind of hokey. Just kind of like, come on, how am I going to do all of these things? These, these six things, 10 minutes, and that's going to make some big deal in my life. And over the years that that morning routine has evolved a little bit and changed, but honestly, it sticks relatively close to that original miracle morning type of model. I just do four of them while I'm walking.

But yeah, if you don't do it, it's a, it's a noticeable difference. It really is. And I do love a good morning routine. Same thing. Now, as a teenager, I didn't have a morning routine, but as an adult, I, I learned the value of that. And I've tried to teach my kids that it's not quite stuck with many of them, but it's the same with huddle. You know, when we look at business and all these successful businesses for years, where are these practices come from? And it's just come from because they work. And it's the same reason we have a huddle in the morning when we start. It's the same reason that when you get to work, you know, your routine, I'm going to open up my inbox. I'm going to clean out my inbox. I'm going to then open up my CRM. I'm going to clean out that. And when you fall out of habit of even your morning business routine and everything else just gets jumbled. That's right. That's right. Cause you're, you are allowing something else to take control of your day instead of you being in control. I think that's the struggle. All right.

So that's self-care number two on your list was culture. Tell us what that means. Culture comes in personal life and business life. Every family has a culture. Every unit has a culture. Every home environment has a culture. Every business environment has a culture. And I've heard rural workmen say this a lot. It's either intentional or it's organic. So it, or even, and I'm going to put on the word accidental, that you created a culture unintentionally, accidentally. You may like it, you may not. But then there's intentional cultures. And most people that create an intentional culture actually like their culture. There are a few that I have seen. They intentionally created it. And then they go, not me because they ended up copying someone else's culture and they weren't staying true to who they are. Culture to me is a reflection of my personality. It's a reflection of me. It's an extension of who I am, who God made me.

It's all my talents, my gifts, my beliefs, my core values, all my experiences. And I have, it's just this outward expression that I have intentionally or unintentionally established around me. When I am intentional about it, it shines. And I'm going to use my business. My business is an intentional culture. And it shines brightly. The branding of it shines brightly. It's impacting. We leave an impression. People remember it. People remember interacting with people on my team. It's intentional, but it's all magnified and reflected from my inner person. And my family is the same thing. I raised my children.

They are a reflection of me. And they all reflect differently, but they were all raised by me and their father. And that we created a family culture. And that would include family councils. That would include our vacations. That would include how we handle it, how we handled conflict. Now, you know, I'm divorced. So we didn't handle conflict that well, but that was the culture. Right. And I didn't think when I was 19 and I met him and 20, when I married him to create an intentional family unit culture.

So the culture we created was accidental. It's not bad. I'm not going to say it's bad, but it's not as good as it could have been. And we have been smarter and have known more. I can say this for anybody that's been through a divorce. I did the best I could do at the time with the tools and the systems and the knowledge that I had. And I believe my ex-husband did as well. But we learned as we grew older and we learned on best practices that we could have been better in certain areas. Right. And we're, we're doing that now. And we have, we have one grandson and we have more, I hope that'll be coming that if not, um, I still love my babies. And if they don't give me any more babies, it's all good.

I'll just spoil. Nope. No pressure. No pressure. I know. Um, but that one boy, he'll be really loved by many. There you go. Um, so culture. Oh, go ahead. Culture gives you freedom. Would you, would you say that? Cause you think about really what you're talking about when it comes to intentionally creating culture, you're talking about just extending discipline into parts of your lives that normally you wouldn't think to put it. And that discipline tends to create freedom, right? Tends to create an easier path. I don't know. I like that. I never thought of it that way before chance, but no, you're right. Because I mean, going back to when we take control of our schedule and we take control of our day, it puts us in a very powerful position. That's right. And when we're in, when we're in power of our environment, it's freedom. Yeah, absolutely.

Thank you. Thank you. Look at that. We'll figure stuff out. I'm just talking about it. Isn't that nice? And you know, so when I, when I first read this, one of the things that kind of struck me was the, the old quote and I off the top of my head, don't know who said it. Um, but you're the average of the five people you hang out with. Right. And so when I first read this on your list, when we were, when we were kind of pre-planning this call, when I thought culture, I was like, to me, that's, you know, a lot of who I'm surrounding myself with and who I want to bring into this community that we're trying to create. And are they good for that community or are they toxic and trying to just kind of cut those toxic relationships out? Because if we're talking about balancing business and personal life, cutting those toxic relationships out, whether it's on your personal life or you're in your business life. And I think for a lot of real estate agents, they hold on to bad relationships for a long time because they're afraid that it's going to negatively impact their business in some way or some, some form. I think cutting those relationships, you, there's such a sigh of relief, such a happiness that comes after that, that you kind of look back and kind of want to kick yourself in the ass for not having done it sooner. Right. Yeah. Um, but that was one of the things that really struck me when I saw culture on your list. I was like, I want to be around people and get better because of, and who I ultimately just build really deep trust with. Right. Yeah. And, and I think you're tying it all in very well. You're doing really good at this connecting a lot of time.

It's like a big therapy session. I know. I'm going to cut you a check. No, I'm not. No, I'm going to cut you a check. Are you kidding me? But no, you're right. And that's the difference between intentional and unintentional because absolutely. You are the son of the five people that are closest around you. Are you intentional in selecting who those five are? Right. Or are you unintentional? So it's the same line of, do you have the power to be around the people that are going to help you grow and to create the culture around you? Or are you, or are you unempowered? Meaning you're not in control by the five that are around you? Cause you have not established that either discipline or that strength to be in control of those five.

And then the freedom. Right. Put that word in. Yeah. When you're on five that you chose, you have freedom. So number three on our list. When I read this, I was like, what, what in the hell is Tammy talking about? So you have, if we're balancing personal life and business, you straight up brought work right into it. And you're like sphere referrals, top 50 are most, are people most likely to give us referrals. So tell me how that helps you balance your personal life and business. Well, why is it being in power and being in a position to select who my clientele is.

When our number one business generation, when our number one income comes from other sources that we're reactive to. Meaning if my business is relies, if my business relies upon the number of people Zillow gives me. Right. I'm not in control. All you're going to do is grind. Yes. But even if Zillow pulls it, I have no income. I'm not in a position to have the freedom and the power. Or the, the non-stress.

And there's another word I'm thinking of, but I can't think of it. But I'm always carrying that around the fear that Zillow could pull my business. Right. My business was on open houses. And we have COVID and we no longer have open houses. I have fear. Or we have post COVID and we don't have open houses because everything sells in two minutes. Right. Also true. Yes. Which is why one of the reasons that I do love workman success is they teach you how to have four pillars. Right. And you have four pillars. You have security. That was the word I was looking for. I can go to bed at night secure. In the knowledge that I have business the next day. Now I did tell you I was divorced.

So I'm in a single income household. And I've not been in a single income household for a long time. I got married at 20. So I very easily could go to bed at night with the fear of where's my income going to come in? Do I have a retirement plan? Can I pay for my daughter to go to college? Can I pay for my other daughter's wedding this next year? Can I have the money for that? But because balancing personal life and business life in business in that, I consider my sphere to be very significant that I've honed relationships with a lot of people. I have deep, personable, loving relationships with a lot of people in the community.

I don't go to bed at night fearful that Zillow is going to yank it or that COVID is going to stop open houses or that all of a sudden the city is going to change their ordinances and I can no longer door knock. I go to bed knowing I can pick up the phone tomorrow and I can go down my list and I can find me a referral. Yeah. We always talk about it in brokerage that, you know, one of the best days in your, as you're starting your career in real estate, one of the best days is when you can tell somebody that you don't want to work with, no, because you don't have to have their business. Yeah. Like that's one of the most freeing days is I can tell this person who's probably an asshole that I don't want to work with them because I don't need that commission to pay my bills this month.

Yeah, I can, I am secure in that I have other business and that my time is better used, not grinding with this person who's going to be, you know, who's going to have an adverse effect on my emotional health, my mental health, probably my liver. And so I don't want to work with that person, right? Yes. Yeah. It's very true. The power of security is immeasurable. And that's why when you looked at it and thought, what the hell is Tammy thinking? It was very important to be part of a work-life balance because I don't go at home at night, very reactive to that Zillow phone call. I don't go home at night, very reactive to the assholes out there in the world.

Nobody's got me under their thumb. Awesome. I love it. Next one up is your team. Yeah. We see this a lot on people who have successful teams. We see the opposite on people who have unsuccessful teams, right? So where's the difference? What does the team do for you now that you have a successful working team? And where's the breakdown for the people who are more stressed because they have a team? Humility. Okay. And that's the word that came to mind. I've not given that much thought before, but that's the word that came to mind when you ask that question is growing a very successful team requires putting aside the ego.

That it's not about me. I don't have to be on the listing appointments. I don't have to be at closing. The review doesn't have to say Tammy Slay in it. The review can give kudos to other agents in the office and to my team members. And when I go to an event that is generating business for the team and we're supporting a small community or a small business in the community and someone walks in and they say, you're Carly, I have loved your communication throughout this and she's our transaction coordinator. And then, oh my gosh, it's so good to see you, Jamie. And I don't know who they are. It doesn't hurt. No. Because I have no ego with that.

I celebrate that. If someone walks in and the first person they ask to see is Monica and not me, I glorify that. So the difference between what I think it makes a successful team or even a successful leader on a team and an unsuccessful leader, because the leader creates the dynamics, is humility. Awesome. I love it. The four most important words in the human language, in my opinion, it's not about you. Oh, yeah. So I tell this story, and I don't know that I've actually told it on this podcast before, but I tell the story fairly often that, you know, I was, I grew up in the era of Reagan, American exceptionalism, Michael J. Fox's Alex P. Keaton.

That's who everybody wanted to be. And so, you know, I had this goal of being a millionaire by the time I was 30, because I really overestimated what a million dollars is at the time. And realized that, you know, if I had a million dollars around 30, that's probably not going to last me for the rest of my life. But I had all these big ambitions and went to college, graduated college, had a good job, had a really crappy apartment. Like, you know, the stereotypical first apartment for a dude out of college, you know, cinder block entertainment center, that kind of thing. Right. But it was, it was in walking distance to the bar. So that was, that was the pro. And I remember when I was in college, my mom would come visit me.

She would always bring me religious books. And then she would help me do my laundry. But I never paid attention to these religious books. I just stuck them on a bookshelf. I was far more interested in sorority girls and cold beer than I was in, you know, whatever book it was that she had brought. And one night, I'm probably 25-ish years old, and I'm nowhere close to being even on the same path of becoming a millionaire. I'm professionally very, very unhappy, just not having a good, not having a good time. I'm having kind of an identity crisis of who I am. And I am legitimately sitting on the floor of this crappy apartment crying about how terrible my life is, which it wasn't that terrible.

But I reach over and I pick up a book off this shelf that my mom had brought. I opened the book up. I read the first four words. I closed the book. And I've never read another sentence in that book. Really? And the book was A Purpose Driven Life. And the first four words were, it's not about you. And anytime and every time I have to make a big decision, anytime and every time I have some sort of crisis or, you know, whatever it is, those are the four words, it's not about you, that I will mentally say to myself before I go into whatever I have to go into.

And so that, yes, that team, that leading from a point of humility and realizing that you're not that significant and you can do more by helping empower others is, it was just a shift of what's the world going to give me versus what can I give to the world? Yeah. That was the difference it made. Can I add something to that? Go for it. So when, I love the word significant. And it's actually in our mission statement, our mission is for everyone we interact with to feel significant. I love it. And so for me to be more significant, I have to have more humility.

For me to make, and I heard this the other day, and I don't know who said it. I know who said it to me, but they didn't, it didn't originate with them. And it was true success. It's going beyond success and into significance. And success is not about at the end of the day, how much money did I take home or even limiting yourself to how much money you take home. Success is when you move beyond a position of just yourself and you go into a position of creating significance in others, meaning empowering your buyer's agents, empowering your listing agents, empowering other agents to pay their mortgage.

Can you imagine that? Do you mind me asking you how many people are in CB&A? We're about 450 agents. Chance, you have a responsibility for 450 families to pay their mortgage. I know. That is very significant. Yes. You are very significant to 450 family units out there. And you would not be in that position if you did not have humility. We built this brokerage on the idea that we could help people become independent, become more in control of the destiny that they want to have in their lives.

Now, we have agents who want to take over the world, right? They want to be the next Tammy Slay. And we have agents who they legitimately want to sell four or five homes a year just to pay for their kids extracurricular and maybe go on a nice vacation. And that's fine. We're here to help them reach that goal no matter how big or small it is because I think that that is the essence of the entrepreneurial spirit of what we do, right? I think that's what we're doing. And that's what we're doing.

It's one of the things I tell our agents all the time. I don't think that we as Realtors do a very good job of taking a break every now and then and just stepping back and realizing the significance, realizing the impact we have on people's lives. We are the purveyors and protectors of the American dream of home ownership. And I think that that is just maybe the coolest job ever. Yeah, it really is. And speaking as a mom, when you give this information to your children and in coaching, because I do coach and I share with my coaching clients to share their lead tracker. Share their CRM with their spouses, with their partners, with their children, because if there happens to be a time where you need another hour to prospect, they need to know that one phone call is what's standing between you paying a mortgage or not.

What's the value of that one phone call? Invite them to be a part of that. When your family or your team or I'm going to say your brokerage or even your assistant knows you're at the movies, when they understand that that movie for you is so significant that it ensures 450 people can pay their mortgage, because sometimes you've got to just step back and focus on chance. Yep. How much more understanding is a home life when you go to the movies? Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. You made the perfect segue here to item number five, which is coaching.

Now, you and I are both obviously huge proponents of coaching. And I don't necessarily know that it has to be coaching in your real estate business. It can be coaching in other parts of your life as well. You know, when I tell you that I go work out Monday, Wednesday and Thursday at five, I have a coach with me that is training me. Because A, if I don't, I'm not showing up because I'd rather do something else other than work out. But B, because they know how to do what they do better than I do. Yeah, it's very true. How does coaching impact your work-life balance? So when I put that down, I came at it from two perspectives. One is being a coach.

And the other is being coached. And like you, I do both. I'm a coach. And I'm also coached. And in different facets of life. And so business-wise, I coach, I coach my business. I coach my brokerage. I coach my team members. I coach my employees. I coach other business owners across the nation. And I do that through Workman Success Systems, where I coach them. That coaching hones skills. And it hones these muscles, these internal emotional muscles, and these intellectual muscles that I would not get anywhere else.

Right. There's nowhere else that challenges me and flexes those muscles the way coaching other people does. When we go back to humility, when you give of your time to help other people, it just automatically creates that humility. But it strengthens me as a leader. So then I can turn around. So in this way, I am facing these people, coaching them. And in this way, I'm on the other end. And all these people are coaching me. In the home, because I have a coach at work, that coach helps me look at place in my business.

For example, the difference between gross commission income and net commission income. Prior to coaching, I focused on gross. Right. Coaching. Industry focuses on gross. Industry does. But who cares? Even takes it a step further back. And they just focus on sales volume. They actually don't care if you make a commission. You can discount it all day long. Right. But who cares if you can't pay your bills? But coaching opened my eyes and put me in a place where I'm now looking at how much money am I bringing home? So our conversations aren't around sales volume and gross. Our conversations are around net. And because my coach was doing that to me, I'm now looking at these people over here doing the same thing in business.

So my coach opened up my eyes to a lot of things business-wise, but it's had the benefit of creating a stronger family unit with me and my children and my grandson. What I'm learning here just automatically benefits my home life and creates this balance. Same at home. And you mentioned it, the fitness instructor. When we have a coach in those areas, I have dance instructors that coach me. When I have these people that help me grow personally, then I show up to work the next day and I am refreshed, rejuvenated, re-energized.

And I think and think with clarity. And would you say that since you've become a coach, and let's say specific to real estate, that since you've become a coach, you've gotten better at your craft and you've built more of a business because of teaching other people? Absolutely. 198%. Absolutely. And there, it was a side effect I did not expect. I started coaching to give back because I appreciated all my coaching did for me. Right. And then when I went and I started coaching other people, I started hearing stories of struggles and challenges in other businesses that either I hadn't faced yet, or I had faced, but I didn't document it, or I didn't really dig deep into it.

And so as I'm coaching these people, and they're growing their business just a little bit differently than the way I grow my business, it's expounded my mind. And I'm able to get in and I'm able to just get in the trenches with them. And this almost partnership forms because I care about their business. I make no money off their business, but I care about their business. Right. And to be a part, right now I have 15 coaching clients, to be a part of 15 other people's success story and to see their growth year over year, to see them grow as leaders, to see them even fail and get right back up. Oh, it's so rewarding.

And significant. Yeah. We, so what we have learned now the hard way. So anytime a new agent joins our brokerage, we assign them an experienced mentor. And so each one of our mentors will carry about five to six new agents at any given time. Well, what we have found is that there is an expiration date on mentors because as they teach, they get better at what they do. And at some point, what we're figuring out is around that two year mark, they can't be mentors anymore because they're just too darn busy in their business. And so we, we know when someone's at that year and a half mark, we need to start looking for their replacement. Wow. It's interesting to watch from a 30,000 foot view.

It's really interesting to watch how that develops over time. Yeah. That behavior that just internalizes within them. Yeah. But I mean, you know, we think about, you think about everybody out there and I use Tom Brady as an example, and whether you like or don't like Tom Brady, there's no denying the man's success. Right. And there's a, there's a, a theory in sports called periodization. And actually there's a really great book called the 12 week year. So little inside piece of trivia. When he talks about when they first presented this to an insurance group and all of that, in that book, I was in that room. I did a, I did a very brief stint as a life insurance, financial planning type of person.

And it just so happened to be when they were testing 12 week year out before he even wrote the book and happened to be in that room. So that's where I first got introduced to time blocking and stuff like that. But really what coaching does is it really makes you focus on these are the things that I've got to do to reach a goal. Get rid of all the other crap that is in your life that you don't need to be doing. Delegate it, get rid of it, hire an assistant to do stuff, whatever that looks like. And really you get to focus on the stuff that is super impactful and super significant. If we're going to use that word in your life and in your business, which for the record is usually the stuff that you got into business to do in the first place. No one got into real estate to be their own accountant.

That just sucks. Right? I like that perspective. They got into real estate because they want to help people. They want to empower people to be homeowners. They wanted to have control of their freedom, their destiny. If you can focus just on those things, those why you got into the industry and let other people do it. And that's where I think coaching comes in because it gives you clarity on those. Yeah. And then there's an accountability factor. Yes, there is. So when we have, you know, if we're going back to work-life balance, I have a daughter who's getting married next year. And in order for me to have funds for that wedding, then I have to have someone, you know, holding me accountable.

Am I doing this? Am I recruiting this? Am I teaching my team members this? Am I creating a better life for them here? Am I, you know, putting this money away? Am I saving this? And it all is. I mean, and I've met with a lot of people that asked, you know, is coaching a debt? And it's not a debt. And I probably once in my life thought about that and thought that same belief that coaching was a debt on my expense column. And absolutely not. No. I remember, I remember when I first hired my coach the very first time, and we were just a couple of years into doing this. And I went to a seminar and I came home and I told my wife, I just did this and it's going to be, I think it was $500 a month at the time or something like that.

And she wanted to murder me and she wanted to murder me and I said, well, I think it's going to be, she was like, okay, fine, whatever, whatever. And, you know, within just a couple of months, maybe three months, it had paid for itself. It does. And I know one of your coaches, I'm pretty partial to him. Yeah, he's all right. More than all right. Awesome. Well, this has been fantastic. I have really enjoyed this. This has been a different look at what I think most people, when they think about balancing their personal life and their business, they don't think about the systems inside their business that can create that balance. And so I think that's been great. I think the word of the day, you know, as much as we've talked about significance here, I think really the word of the day is that it's power.

It's empowering to have work-life balance and to have the discipline in both areas to create that, right? I agree with you 100%. And I'm going to add your second word, be freedom. Yeah. And I'm glad you brought that up because I had not associated freedom and the position of freedom with that, the blessing of freedom. When you empower yourself, you do generate freedom. There's nothing more amazing. I think it's a gift of freedom to people. That's right. Well, thank you, Tammy. Appreciate you coming on today. This has been really fun. And for those of you watching, thank you for stopping by. We hope that you're able to take some of these tips and put them into your business and that we've made it easy enough for you to just take them and really simply apply and that they'll be significant and have an impact on your business.

And we'll see you next time on Top 5. We'll see you next time on Top 5.